hello. it's been a while.

yea. so im going to tell u sthg u know. tt i've been very busy.

yea. isnt everyone?

isnt it funny how sometimes we give so much to others such tt we have no time for ourselves. im sorry. im selfish. i am like no man magnanimous enough to give up himself for the benefit of others.

between foc, dance, tuition and him, im overstretched. how do u think i feel when i watch my mum's crestfallen face as i walk into the house after midnight, night after night.

i havent had time to read, havent had any time to catch up with any of my friends. not any. nicole, veena, shahreena, fharhana, reeza, razil, talib, ben. ppl i have promised myself BEFORE exams tt i would go out with. i havent met some of them for more than 6 months! i feel like a lousy friend. i feel like im not making any effort. and the worse thing is, i really am trying to make effort. it just seems impossible.

i dunno. perhaps its just me. im was just too used to having too much time for myself. time to watch movies alone, think abt stuff, walk home alone frm school, spend time alone with my textbooks, my novels, my time magazine, my vogue u.s edition, time alone watching oprah, on a lazy weekday afternoon. i miss that.

i miss crying for absolutely no reason. crying when im happy. crying just by watching them do touching stuff on oprah.. damn tt woman.. she has made me a mr softie.

i miss reading xiaxue's blog- my guilty pleasure. she's so dumb, shallow and hilarious i sometimes reali want to kill her. i imagine myself confronting her loud mouth and just spraying her with those stupid party foam things tt she kicked up such a big fuss abt.

i miss reading my friends blog, getting updates abt their life.

tt day, he asked me, if i had 3 wishes, wat wud they be..

i gave him the bullshit.. u know.. my family's health, 2nd one is personal and the third one i said 3 more wishes.

now i know wat i reali want, and wat no genie could ever grant.

i just want more time.